Review by Dana Hagist

My Book Rating: 5/5

I’ve become a big fan of Ryan Holiday over the last six months after reading “Discipline is Destiny” and “The Obstacle is the Way.” These books share Stoic philosophy through stories of triumph and defeat and provide a framework for living a more fulfilled life. For anybody, like me, who at times struggles with distraction and a lack of focus on what really matters, I couldn’t recommend his books more.

“Discipline is Destiny” shares ancient and modern wisdom about how you can rule over your body, mind and soul. Each chapter shares an important principle that you can and should try to incorporate into your habits and worldview. Here are the three principles that resonated with me most.

Lesson 1: Fight the Provocation

Have you ever been cut off in traffic, been yelled at, embarrassed or otherwise felt slighted by somebody else? I definitely have. And for much of my life, I would carry those things with me for far too long. Sometimes I’ll still remember something from months ago and find it will shift me into a negative thinking pattern. We’ve got to learn to let things go. And not later, but right now.

The chapter called “Fight the Provocation” shares this excellent wisdom about avoiding unnecessary conflict with others:

Remember always: As wrong as they are, as annoying as it is, it takes two for a real conflict to happen. As the Stoics said, when we are offended, when we fight, we are complicit. We have chosen to engage. We have traded self-control for self-indulgence. We’ve allowed our cooler head to turn hot–even though we know hot heads rarely make good decisions.

Lesson 2: Get Better Every Day

Sitting at home and watching my toddler daughter try to pronounce new letters and sounds, I’m reminded that with any new endeavor, we typically are starting from ground zero. By the time we are adults, how natural is it for most of us to then be able to read, to write, to walk and run? We take these things for granted and forget that we had to learn how to do them. For anything you’re interested in, making small, incremental progress every day is the best way to master it. For me, it often means making a small committment to something that I will do every single day. When thinking about learning or getting better at something, instead of saying “I don’t have time,” how about asking the question “How much time can I commit to this every day?” If the answer is two minutes, great. Start there.

My favorite “Discipline is Destiny” quote on getting better every day:

Come what may, success or failure, fame or misfortune, a focus on progress lets us look ourselves in the mirror with pride and ignore all the commotion in the background. It’s the journey of a lifetime. In fact, that’s the way to think about all of this: How much progress could you make if you made just a little each day over the course of an entire life? What might this journey look like, where might it lead, if each bit of progress you made presented both the opportunity and the obligation to make a little more progress, and you seized those opportunities, you lived up to those obligations, each and every time?

Lesson 3: Avoid the Superfluous

This is not a chapter that I really thought I needed to hear, but I think it rings true in so many ways. As we find ourselves deeper in careers, in life, on our journey… the impulse to compare and try to keep up is still there, and perhaps amplified. Reducing the chase of material possessions, or popularity, or image is a sure path to at least feeling better than you do today.

The book shares this as a reminder that sometimes more doesn’t always mean better:

Think about how content you were with less just a few years ago. How much more frugal you were… by necessity. How much less you got by on. Do you look back at those younger years, when you were striving and struggling, as somehow lacking? As something you’re bitter about? Not usually. These were happy days. We almost miss them. Things were simpler then. Cleaner. There was more clarity. Most of the luxuries that lay in the futrue we didn’t even know about. We didn’t pine for them. We were ignorant even of their possibility! What it will do is make you less free, more dependent. The less you desire, the richer your are, the freer you are, the more powerful you are. It’s that simple

I highly encourage anyone and everyone to pick up this book and see how implementing some of this ancient wisdom can have an impact in your life. I’m excited about the changes I can make in my own life to live just a little bit better.